And on that bombshell....

Operation day! Weird things aren't they? More to the point, they strangely appeal to my sense of the bizarre. Wake up starving, get tampered with and then get trolleyed to a theatre. I fell asleep immediately which is not bad going for a hyperactive person with insomnia. The last thing I said was 'please be careful with the tattoos'. Priorities, priorities.

Blurringly emerged from the anaesthetic fog surrounded by doctors without the masks. The only English speaking one said 'The operation was a success'. Great. Zapped ovarian cysts and no appendix. That was clear as the other doctor shoved my appendix in a jar in my face. 'However..' he continued. Oh shit, a caveat. Now what can that be?

I had laparoscopic surgery and while fiddling around with my parts in an non invasive way, they found a tumour the size of an orange in my uterus. The only option being a hysterectomy and one soon. So all fuddled and tired and then with this to take in, suddenly my perfectly maintained tattoos were not a priority. I mumbled something about babies which is odd as I really don't like them but then again the whole scene was unreal. He answered it's not cancer and I'll resume a full life again.

They left. Got a phone call from a work contact as I never really was officially on the sick. I started crying and left another person to talk to. Not so professional. Cried again and phoned Zoe who was worried. I hadn't called on schedule. Texted GBFF (Andrew) and received a text back 'Trinny and Susannah together forever' (our alter egos) and then asked one friend to pass on the message to a really good friend who was in Cancun at COP 16 and although my ovaries weren't on his mind, he'd be worried.

A long afternoon where sleep did save me for a while..and left with some quite unsettling news. One problem has indeed uncovered another. And what does he mean..hysterectomy?

The next day, I was treated to a viewing of the tumour. The bastard (or would it be bitch?) which has caused some rather excruciating pains, vomiting, disrupted travel plans and eating for over 2 years. It all became real. I quite like the film now though and it's now part of DVD night at Casa de Liz.